If you want to find out what you've been missing by hiding out with only really nice weights to lift, grab this--the original--functional strength training book.
Serious Strength and Fitness for Busy, Working People
by Todd Baisley
This valuable yet unassuming 84-page book features short, basic workouts designed to increase strength and fitness, wrapped in good basic training advice.
If you follow Brad Johnson's advice, you will not only get very strong in a multitude of directions, but when it comes time to move your body around, it will feel like a feather.
Before the days of cast concrete stones and tacky, it was simple: there were testing stones--manhood stones--and if you were up to the challenge, you lifted them.